old journal fragments; past lives

" November 13, 2008

I am in bed trying to fall asleep and I just heard a plane passing over above me in the sky and I had the strangest feeling of peace and happiness.  Just for a little under a minute.  I don't know why, really.  Hearing planes fly by overhead brings me to other places in life I guess.  Lying in bed in Toronto, even my room on Riverside Drive.  You can only really hear planes fly by when you're only listening to yourself or silence.  It also reminds me of my backyard in London in the fall, or the summer.  Lying on the deck in the dead of summer, with Dudley asleep by the door.  It is one of those universally familiar noises.  It is always the same noise, wherever and whenever you are.  It is such a peaceful noise.  For some reason I imagined that plane flying through the navy blue French skies on its way across the ocean back to North America.  I guess because that is where I would like to be right now.  I can hear another one!  It sounds like air and silence and beautiful sleep.  I don't know but I feel flooded with fragments of memories of blinding sunlight from the summer sky in London, winter in St. John's.  You only hear it when you stop listening.  I feel so calm knowing home is so close."